Take it from a helpless romantic like myself; women like a man who puts up a good fight. When it comes to gaining access to a woman's heart; patient persistence is key! I believe in soulmates and that certain people have one person that they're meant to be with. I don't think everyone does, but only those who are meant to be together because they have something to accomplish together (i.e. partners). Yet on the other hand, I also believe that the pursuit of passion pays off. I have heard countless love stories of a woman not being into a guy, at first, but he wouldn't relent. His pursuit in winning her heart paid off over time because he didn't give up. In the end, he wins her heart, and she falls head over heels in love with him! He proved to her that he cared for her! It can be as simple as that.
Women are programmed to desire stability and security. If we can't find it from a partner who wants to provide that then we will provide it for ourselves. There's nothing wrong with a woman being independent and taking care of herself. At the same time, having a caring partner that wants to step up to the plate, isn't a turn off either. Real women don't want a scrub, but a man who has his life together. Everything might not be perfect, but you're taking responsibility for your life and actions. This shows that you're capable of being a leader; especially during difficult times where she needs a shoulder to lean on. She'll know that she can turn to you to be there for her.
If there is a special woman that gives you butterflies or makes your heart skip a beat; then you need to invest in the pursuit. There's something attractive and undeniable about a man pursuing a woman (the right way). Don't go overboard crossing the line from innocent interest to stalker. Start subtle by striking up a conversation with her to get to know her. Then allow this to progress gradually to a possible coffee date that leads to something more romantic. When you talk to her, actually listen to what she's saying. Keep your eyes fixed on hers so she knows that you're paying attention. Then allow your soft gaze to linger a few seconds longer; signaling that you're attracted to her. Holding her eye contact will let her know that this isn't a platonic conversation.
I can't tell you exactly how long it will take to pursue your dream girl because everyone is different. Some women are overcoming the pain of past relationships and don't want to get hurt again. Then there are others that will put you to the test; making you wait in order to see if you're interest is legit or just smoke and mirrors. They're may be other men trying to pursue her as well. The longer you hold out and stick with it, the more you'll prove that you're different from the others. When you're truly serious about someone, you put who they are as a person first. Those other guys may be pursuing her for her looks only. If you're a true man who wants her heart; you're pursuit will show that you care about all of her (not just her physical attributes).
If you're truly attracted and interested in a particular woman; you'll be willing to give everything that you got in order to prove to her that you're the real deal!
Sante
